By: Irma Prado
Father, you haven’t wanted to talk to me for a long time, so I decided to write you this little letter, I hope you read it very carefully, because in this letter I will allow my soul to express itself completely and openly.
I want to tell you what I feel and think about you, dad, I want to vent; Encourage me once and for all to tell you how it hurts me not to have had you, because although I tried to overcome it, it is so difficult to forget that you forget about me, that you are not here and that you never were, that all the insecurities or at least many of them are due to your absence .
I was always looking for paternal images but I knew that each one had their children, that I was only the son’s nephew or friend, but not his son, he was yours and I did not feel part of your life.
It is so difficult for me to talk to you about this without crying, without my voice trembling and without feeling that perhaps I demand too much of you, because sometimes I also think that you did what you could even though that was not much.
The most terrible fears are those of thinking «who is going to love me if you should love me, nor do you care about me».
And having asked you so many times to call me for my birthday and you didn’t, telling me you were going to change and you didn’t.In no project of my life have you been, that you don’t even know who I am because you don’t know me, because we never had a talk that would make us know each other better, that I could tell you that I love to sing, that music is my cable to earth, that I have friends who consider me a good person, that your son is a good person.Sometimes I wonder why you never assumed your role as a father? Don’t you know that I need you? That I live waiting for something, the least from you and I continue with an empty soul, with so much misunderstanding about how are the reciprocal feelings of a father and a son.How strange are some forms of love, if it is true; when once you told me «I love you, son».
If you knew the pain I feel, I think you could not continue living, knowing that it was because of you.But well, it is what it is, and the saddest thing of all, sad for me, not for you, is that tomorrow when you feel alone you will remember that you have a son, you will knock on my door and I am going to attend, because I, thanks to God and to life, am not like you; because life taught me to love, although you have not taught me and as much as I have needed your love and your attention; You didn’t give them to me the way I wanted them. But having lived through this taught me to give what I can.
I repeat once again: When you need me, come back to look for me because I will be waiting for that day and I will not deny you the attention and affection that you denied me for so long.Forgive me if any of the words I have said have offended you, this was not exactly my intention in telling you what I have just written; I hope you understand me and you can talk to me one day because I still miss you and I would like us to form a true father-son relationship.
REFLECTION ON THIS STORY:Parents have to be an example of love and paternity for our children, because although many of us do not know it, they may be suffering because of the need for our love that they feel in their hearts.Let’s be good parents who give a lot of love to their children so that they have enough self-esteem and always feel loved; Well, if we can’t give them the love they need, they will always feel insecure and believe that they don’t deserve love from others.
Each parent is responsible for their child to grow up without any emotional or sentimental problem, since it will be the bad actions of each parent that will cause many of the most serious problems for each child.A father has the obligation to instruct his son well; because if he doesn’t, this son could be misguided by other people.
